Edie's Last Days:
I take Mom to Kaiser for "Evaluation".
She moves around - reality wise - not too far out.
Her Doctor, sweet voice for seniors I gather,"Hello Mrs. Dane. Can you tell me who you are ?"
Edie, in her most cultured tone with tightened jaw,"You know perfectly well who I am, and so do I."
Bill Dane
Edie's Last Days:
Mom has a double room at Kaiser.
Curtain, and older couple's voices, next bed over.
They've been arguing about the wife going home, etc !
Edie is in and out - stream of consciousness mumblings.
(It was always entertaining and cried out for 'sense making')
She suddenly sits shot up straight, and in loud and no uncertain terms,"For God's sake take her home.
Can't you see she wants to go home"
Bill Dane
Edie's Last Days:
Mom has been at Kaiser for 10 days.
Today is "Decision Day". Edie has to move on.
Her Doctors must recommend her next placement.
They've tried Meds and Talk and Scans = fuzzy picture !
Her Doctors want Kaiser to pay for her to go to Rehab.
She must pass a "Mobility Exam" - Mind and Body !
In comes the 'brand new', really young, testing "Therapist".
Sweetest high voice, for elders I gather, "Good morning Edie.
Now, You have to do what I ask so you'll get that wonderful new
placement. Let's sit up. Up we go, Edie. Now let's just swing
your legs over the edge of the bed. Here we go. Try to do it all
by yourself, Edie". At this point Mom grasps her arm tight.
In a perfectly articulated, tight jawed, patrician tone,"You may try to get me to do anything you want, Dear.
It will not work. I died at ten o'clock this morning".
Bill Dane
2010 Health Care:
Screaming - pointing - swearing - spitting into Other faces;
Fellow citizens who themselves would suffer without Medicare and
the other patched together Government Health Care they're trashing.
Never mind their bibles and 'right-to-certain-kinds-of-life' stuff.
Bill Dane
I hear:
Please hang on !
Bill Dane
Childhood-Story:
1964 Not working
We have jobs at SKS Die Casting.
Black, Willie Goodjoint, 63, my casting machine leader.
Black, William Jones, 25, factory custodian.
White, Bill Dane, 25, grunt n gofer.
We eat lunch and talk together for 3 months.
Brown-bag sitting on 4th Street.
Luckily, Willie keeps his job.
William and I are laid off.
We visit each other's apartments twice.
In downtown Oakland with a wife and two daughters.
In Richmond with a wife and a painting space.
We're both smart enough. . We use our words.
We can feel what's coming. . We're not super-stars.
Bill Dane
Childhood-Story:
1944 1st grade Mrs. Marchand
Perfect rows. Facing teacher, I'm far right in back.
Raise my hand to go to the bathroom. "Not now, Billy".
Three more times, "Not now, Billy !""Not Now, Billy !!""NOT NOW, BILLY !!!"
I feel the warm running over my legs. Wet pants. Big puddle.
I leave the room.. Can't remember coming back.
Bill Dane
I read Janet's "Staircase of Roots" again
suspended reality and wrote this:
She greets Ess, "Sweetheart"all the time
I feel a mixed thing
jealous..good . fun
"Sweetheart", I text Nancy
why not sooner
Standing right here with Her
"Sweetheart", I try out loud
once . in fun
Bill Dane
Childhood-Story:
1950s "Don't pooh-pooh The Groo"From the daily back n forth of our '50s 'crew'.
I don't remember anyone ever identifying"The Groo".
Bill Dane
I hear:
... you're gonna need a bucket an' a mop ...
Bill Dane
Childhood-Story:
1947
Donnie Goode eats worms.
Once, I ask him to do it.
He does. . I'm heart-sick. . Never again.
Bill Dane
Childhood-Story:
1949 "The Spanking"
Can't remember what I did.
He tells me to lie on my bed.
Picks the bench up over his head.
Hits me three times on my butt.
I call him a bastard and try squeezing-hard not to cry.
Bill Dane
Today is Monday, September 29, 2009
Nick and I really ''finished'' the Website
Let down comin' ?!.
We'll just ease on down the line . . .
and go tweak it again
Bill Dane
I hear:
Your group could start on the top floor
and my group could start on the bottom, ..or. ...
Bill Dane