Childhood-Story:

1949 "The Spanking"

Can't remember what I did.

He tells me to lie on my bed.

Picks the bench up over his head.

Hits me three times on my butt.

I call him a bastard and try squeezing-hard not to cry.

Today is Monday, September 29, 2009
Nick and I really ''finished'' the Website
Let down comin' ?!.
We'll just ease on down the line . . .
and go tweak it again

I hear:

Your group could start on the top floor

and my group could start on the bottom, ..or. ...

Vietnam and into our future:
No Draft = More Wars.
Ironic.
Norman Mailer knew it then !

Warning!
The .BILL VIDEOS

I hear:... He thought it was a little bit mo' down than it was ...

I hear:
You're makin' me hit people with this

Childhood-Story:

1940s SilverPines Camp and Sleep-Overs

It's not fun if you wet your bed.

Camp, at night and in the morning, goes real badly.

Cabin-Buddy. Heine Kuechler's compassion saves two summers:

"Don't worry, Billy.. We'll just hang it up to dry"

And we hang it up a lot.
In 7th grade I stay awake all night at Cutler's to escape the demon.

The father leaves our house - the demon goes with.

I hear:
... Pretty soon there 'r frogs everywhere ...

Childhood-Story:

1945 Frankie's Accident

I'm playing in the backyard.

Frank is 5, takes my bike and rides off around the corner.

People are yelling and hollering.

We run down the block to find him lying in the street.

All our neighbors are there.

My father screams at me , "Go home Billy. Go home. Get out of here."

Two weeks later Frank comes out of the coma.

I teach him how to walk and talk again.

I don't remember the father being there.

I hear:
... she has a 2 year old biting, biting, biting
the shit out of his big sister ...

Childhood-Story:
1938-2010
I stop wetting my bed the day he leaves for sure.
He has another family and a daughter.I am "estranged" from my father real early.Why else do I block, put-out-of-my-mind
and find stored way beyond everyday retrieving
the fact that my half sister Sarah is murdered.

BECKETT:

" ... after long vain reckonings the head falls back among the data."

from "Mercier and Camier"

Childhood-Story:

1944 Turf stuff

We chase a kid who bikes into our neighborhood.

He's riding frantically fast - hit by a car at the corner - broken leg.

I meet him later in the year, by accident, and apologize.

I hear:
Stand back, Sweetie. I can't see the ...

Childhood-Story:"The fickle finger of fate
The moving finger writes
And having writ moves on"Our wee boy band of jr high friends
starts saying this to each other in 1950
when life deals us a perceived shit blow.

+- 2009, college and care.
I'm suffering from "Early Onset Parsimony", see:
"Contagious ! The Common Man's College Loan & Health Care Syndromes, Etc !"
Not covered by this criminal nation's non systems for citizen care.
Puke at will !

I watch:
OK. Right here. Now, spin to your left.
There. Now, step back. Good.
Now, sit down next to this beautiful person.
(Smiling - Laughter)

The Sickened:
We think and feel about it more and less.U.S.A. Citizens' Health Care Is SiCKO!
Obama - Doctor Fresh Air - a chance to get better ?!
BUT! Our consciousness, will, power. to move beyond
corporate fascism to Single Payer and Civilization ?! Sad !
Lucky! Our family has a real costly health plan for: babies, hernias,
new hip, colonoscopies, hamartoma, melanoma and on it will go.
We think and feel more and less - about class and money
and luck and entitlement - about empathy.There are people working to change this.
There are also people who say they are not naive.
They tell us this is how it is and was everywhere and forever.
Looking at my images after photo hunting and gathering I know
stuff is always close by; health - housing - sex - war - greed -
injustice and on it goes .....
Good luck to all of us, Bill

Backyard-Visitors:
Friends, Hummingbirds, Chickadees, Titmice, Nuthatches, Sparrows, Finches, Towhees, Woodpeckers, (an occasional Peckerwood) , Doves, Crows (Moses says they're Ravens), Flycatchers, a Jay, Squirrels, Raccoon families - we have 4 feeders, 2 baths, 9 trees: Princess 'Bush', Weeping River Wattle, Himalayan Birch, Strawberry Tree, Norfolk Pine, Japanese Coral Bark Maple, Canary Island Pine, Brazilian Pepper, Roscoe Maple, half a Bottle Brush, bamboo, vines, Edie succulents, all Nancy's succulents-plants-flowers . +